Two things happened last week that require some discussion. Actually, they don?t need to be discussed at all; if anything, they are the sort of thing that a normal person absolutely would not discuss, but both events troubled me and left an (admittedly tiny) scar upon my day.
Both things were borderline mortifying for very different reasons. The first thing was that someone managed to land their spittle inside my nostril. They spoke, they spat, and the resulting saliva fleck somehow projected itself from their mouth to the wall of my nasal passage. I don?t quite know how this happened as the person who spittled (spattled") at me (completely accidentally I hasten to add) was standing and I was sitting, therefore they were positioned high above me. If anything, the spittle should have landed on the top of my head, or even ? at a push ? the tip of my nose, but no: it managed to fly downwards towards my mouth and then, at the last second, it did a complete u-turn and shot up my nostril. The only feasible explanation for this phenomenon is that I must have breathed in sharply through my nose at the very moment the fleck of saliva passed by. I suppose that it is entirely possible that this would occur, especially if my subconscious had sensed that some spit was making its way towards my upper lip – the thought of such impending horror would have no doubt sent my body into emergency shut-down mode.
I have a thing about other people?s spit touching me. Don?t we all. But...