These five words are something I say to myself during a variety of interaction points through our marriage.
And I think knowing this, and accepting really early on that takes away a little bit of the movie-like fairytale romance out of our relationship, has saved us from so many arguments.
The five words are “He’s not a mind reader”. 
This phrase was in a book on marriage that I read while we were engaged and I’ve carried this thought into our marriage in so many ways.
Justin and I have a lot of similarities, but our love languages are pretty different. It takes time to become tuned to how your partner receives and gives love, and that is something Justin and I are always adjusting and working on as our lives change. sidebar: I can’t use the words “giving and receiving” without thinking of Joey’s example of his speech for Chandler and Monica’s wedding. #friendsreference
Physical affection (something as simple as touching my shoulder or the top of my back when he passes me in the house) means so much to me. Justin is not naturally a “physical touch” kind of guy, so he has to make a great effort to do that for me.
Justin really appreciates words of affirmation and I can struggle to give those freely. I can look at a household task as a just a basic “check that off the list” thing that could easily go unmentioned, but it means a lot to him if I notice that he did it and say “hey thanks for doi...