Do you remember when I whipped myself in the face with a fully-grown tree" It wasn’t one of my finest moments; I almost lost an eye and I think that my children are probably emotionally scarred for life. (They’re not. That’s a lie. They didn’t even look up from the iPad when I screamed “GET DADDY!” I could have had an arm hanging off, a stampede of rhinos charging towards me, a crocodile about to shut its jaws on my head and they wouldn’t have stopped painting patterns on the cartoon fire engine. The power of the iPad.)

Anyway, I was looking for a photograph of something else entirely when I stumbled across some rather impressive before and after pictures that I took when I was experimenting with cover-up makeup. I did some Poirot deduction work and realised that I had been playing about with the Vichy Dermablend but had never written up my findings.
The reason that this particular foundation has slipped the net (unusually, because if I’ve made the effort to do before and afters of a foundation then you can almost guarantee I’ll write a review post to make use of them!) is that I haven’t actually worn it again. And with my foundation tests, I’ll wear them for weeks on end, comparing them to similar products, seeing how they last in different conditions, generally putting them through their paces.
I didn’t want to wear this foundation again, but not because it wasn’t nice to wear (it’...